IN HIS SHADOWS 3

Haha! Why are you talking like this? Ki lo se yin? (What happened to you?) She asked looking at her sister with irritation. I just told you everything that caused the disagreement and you are acting and talking as if I did something bad.

“Assuming the children are not sleeping, this is how you will be shouting abi? Can’t we just have a normal conversation without you flaring up?  She asked. Surprised at her countenance.

I’m shouting abi? Why won’t I shout when what you are saying is not making sense! Sister mi? Have you forgotten so soon ni? You should understand better even if others don’t! She said as she shook her head in disbelief and paced the room.

“Remi…don’t let’s dwell on the past! If we don’t forget the past, we can’t move forward and step into the rest that God promises. You know, the bible says…

“Cut me out of the bible scriptures aunty Doyin! Spare me all those things! You really surprised me big time! I came here, knowing that you as my sister will listen to me and take my side knowing where we came from, but I never knew you’ve completely changed to someone else! She managed to reduce her voice so that kay will not draw attention to them and come to her room to check them.

“Whatever happened to the pact we made? She asked as bitterness and anger colored her face.

God broke the pact Remi! She shouted back as tears gathered in her eyes, tears of sorrow as to how bitterness, hatred and anger had eaten her sister up, tears of how her only sister was still stuck in the past, tears that her sister still held on to the pact they made years ago that almost ruined her. She is not going to open her eyes and let her sister’s life be destroyed.

“God opened my eyes! She said again softly as she grabbed her sister’s shoulders and made her sit.

“I fought with Kay almost every day! I didn’t take any nonsense from him. But when I saw that my marriage was slipping away from me, my daughter, Modesoyin was becoming emotionally traumatized when we the parents didn’t provide an emotionally stable home for her.

Remi, my daughter screams out from her sleep every night, my husband was losing so much- spiritually and in career. The ship of my home was almost broken! Then I saw a revelation from God. He told me that He isn’t happy with me, He said I have made the life of His son a living hell, He said I didn’t allow Kay to give Him his best. He said I was raising a child of bitterness and trauma and not a godly seed. He said I was fighting the wrong battle!

“I was supposed to battle against the enemy that wants to destroy the joy of my home, I was supposed to battle against my past and the seed of bitterness that was rooted in me. He made me understand that I have turned out like my father! He raised bitter children and I was already doing the same.  He told me so many things in that dream and He looked sad.

“I carried my baggage into my marriage. I wasn’t fulfilling what God expected of me as a wife and mother. She said with a sad smile.

See, this is our own life! We must be deliberate about it. We made the pact but I have broken it. I don’t want to end up like my dad, I don’t want to raise bitter children. Yes, dad maltreated mom and dealt harshly with her, yes! We decided to take charge and not be too submissive but it’s to our detriment Remi! God gave us good men, they don’t deserve it neither does our children. She finished with a sigh.

She hugged her sister who was crying heavily as she held hands with her and prayed.
*****
Jesus…she cried out… as she switched on the bedside lamp.

“Honey, what is it? Kay asked as he rubbed his face.

“It’s just a dream.

To be continued…
Written by: Tolulope Dabo

Picture credit: Internet.

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